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When your reaction slows down the truth
Who can tell you you’re wrong in real time?
Not later. Not privately. Not after the meeting ends.
In the moment.
Leaders often point to access. An open office. A willingness to talk. An invitation for feedback.
Access isn’t the same as safety.
Power doesn’t disappear because you’re approachable. It’s built into the structure. Your role. Your title. The fact that people are walking into your space.
The question isn’t whether people can come to you.
It’s how quickly they will.
Speed Is the Indicator
When you give incorrect information in a meeting, will others correct you right away?
Or does the room pause?
Do people exchange glances? Do they wait? Do they decide afterward whether it’s worth bringing up?
When truth slows down, that’s a signal.
Over time, people begin to calculate. They rehearse how to say it. They choose who has the strongest relationship with you. They filter what feels safe to challenge.
You’re still leading. You’re just receiving a curated version of reality.
That delay compounds. Decisions lag. Ideas stay safer. Innovation flattens.
The Reflex That Teaches the Room
Most leaders believe they’re open to feedback.
The issue isn’t belief. It’s reflex.
When someone challenges your idea, what does your body do first?
A visible exhale.
A tightened jaw.
A defensive explanation.
A subtle edge in your tone.
You may say, “I’m fine with feedback.”
But your face answers first.
Teams are highly attuned to that micro-response. They adjust accordingly. If correction feels uncomfortable, they reduce how often they offer it.
That’s not about their courage. It’s about your reaction.
Creating an Environment Where Truth Moves Faster
If you want faster feedback, you have to regulate your response to it.
That means:
Receiving before explaining.
Thanking before defending.
Staying steady long enough for others to layer ideas.
Most first drafts aren’t strong. That’s normal. The quality emerges when someone says, quickly, “That’s not it,” and others build from there.
You cannot get there if people are bracing for your reaction.
Here, the structure is clear: power is present, whether you name it or not. Your reactions shape how quickly truth reaches you.
If this pattern is slowing down your team, this is the work I facilitate with leadership groups and supervisors. We practice regulating responses so correction becomes normal, not costly. Hop on my calendar if you want to learn more.
